Thursday, June 14, 2018

When All You Can Do Is Laugh...

So it's been an eventful two weeks. This is how it went down...
It started with our big camp meeting that we have every year. During the prayer, when the leaders spoke against opposition, I couldn't help but feel a little weird. This year has been different for us, especially financially. We've donated more than we have ever before, more so that even with the past years put together this year's donation was more than that figure quadrupled. On the way home, the only "opposition" I could think of was when we tried to find babysitters for the kids. So I talked about it with Aldo. He calmed my weirdness over the situation referring to the story of friends holding up Moses' arms during the battle against the Amalekites. In a way we were stepping in to hold up the arms (financial burden) during a time when our friends experienced job loss. That settled things.

Not even a day later, the opposition came. If you're one to look at it that way, I guess. We were in a meeting at the church and were just about ready to go when Luke climbed up the welcome booth for some unknown reason because he's usually not a "climber" (a booth that was on wheels to be thrown in the trash) and it fell over on top of him. Thankfully he was thrown as it fell down so that it only fell on his feet. Thankfully it bounced so that he could remove his feet and didn't get stuck underneath. Thankfully, Mila had moved closer to me seconds before to say she was ready to go home. And thankfully, Aldo made it to the meeting because he hadn't been feeling well that morning and took off work (otherwise he would have been a closer and wouldn't have been at the meeting). It took only seconds. But it felt like I stood there for 10 minutes in shock. I honestly cannot tell you what I did in between the time I saw Luke's face after the impact and getting Mila in the car. I remember the breaking of glass and initially thinking Luke was crying because he broke something that belonged to the church, not because he had hurt his feet. The face he made is forever ingrained in my head. It breaks my heart that I didn't react more quickly. Aldo, on the other hand, went into calm, yet fast, parent mode and asked the all the right questions. We made the decision to take Luke to the ER. I'm sure that Aldo was worried, he just never let it on. Mila came with us; it was already late and she was worried about Luke. She said, "Luke's crying so Mila's crying," and talking about getting Luke a band-aid.

I hate going to the ER. It seems like if you are gushing blood and guts coming out (sorry for the graphic imagery), they just take their sweet time. But I am thankful for doctors and nurses and everyone that is working hard to get you in and out. On the way there, all we could do was tell Luke to breathe through the pain. We waited for a while in the waiting room, then we went to triage, where they decide the urgency of your care. Then we went to his room and waited some more. In between all of that, I saw that Luke was tearing up and asked if he would like me to hold onto his glasses. So I was put in charge. By the time we made it to his room and Luke went to the restroom, the glasses had disappeared. No one has found them since. One minute I had them hanging on my shirt. I did not touch them. And the next minute they were gone. Aldo has no words for it either. Probably because we just picked up our new glasses two days before. And probably because that night we had found the camp flashdrive that I had "lost" in my computer bag. Pregnancy brain... it's a real thing. So while waiting, I was also mad at myself for losing Luke's brand new glasses. Let's just pile on the bills, shall we?

They took x-rays and ended up putting Luke in ace bandages on both feet and a splint on the left foot, which was tender, already bruising, and swollen. They also gave us crutches and told us we could follow up sometime in the next week with our doctor. It was about 5 o'clock in the morning when we were discharged. Aldo went to go get the car while we waited in the waiting room. Mila had fallen asleep finally after going between laps, coloring, and eating everyone's hospital snacks. A minute later I got a call - we had a flat tire. Aldo said to never pray for opposition ever again. I didn't pray for it! All I said was I felt weird!!! As Aldo was changing out the tire as the sun came up, I was in the waiting room hoping someone would turn in Luke's glasses before we left the building. :( It never happened though. We made it home at 6:00 am and were exhausted. I called in to work. It was supposed to be my first Wednesday going in early... but there was no way I'd be able to function on an hour of sleep.

On the way home, Luke said, "Mom, I'm lucky. It could've been worse. The booth could have fallen on my legs!"
Me: "Or on your body and broken your ribs!"
Luke: "Or on Mila!"
Me: "Yeah, bud"
Luke: "Mom, I think God was watching out for me."
Me: "Luke... I think he sent angels around you!!!"
He's so sweet. I am proud of the young man he is becoming...

But that's not all!

Wednesday morning we were woken by a phone call. The ER told us that they were looking over the x-rays again and were pretty sure Luke had fractured his foot, so we should get a follow up right away with a pediatric orthopedic specialist. (Note: Something of concern for Luke's age are the growth plates.) That day we went in to the specialist -- awesome, awesome doctors and nurses -- and found out that Luke's foot was broken in two places... the right foot. Seriously? Luke had been walking around on a broken foot?! It took them less than 15 minutes to put a cast on Luke's broken, right foot with a walking shoe and a boot on the other foot. The other foot was too swollen to see fractures or breaks at this point, but better to err on the side of caution. We made an appointment for a week later to get x-rays again and look at the left foot. Then, we proceeded to Walmart where we had the tire fixed.

Two Broken Bones in the Right Foot

Our Trooper (& First in Our Family to Break Something)

I must also mention, prior to all of this I had asked Luke what he wanted to do for his 8th birthday and his one request was a Skating Party. As it turns out, I never got any contact information for his best friend from school, who I really wanted to be there. And both of Luke's cousins are out of town for the entire summer. We agreed that it wasn't worth the money to have the party without the people he would want to be there, and especially because he can't skate. We made plans to take him to the Omaha Zoo with some of our best friends, who would definitely make his birthday special. After the entire foot debacle, we had to tell Luke there would be no Skating Party. He was devastated. (He didn't know about the Omaha Zoo surprise coming up that weekend.) He said, "I guess I'll have a Dinosaur Party". I found this really cool cast design that makes it look like scales and a dinosaur/dragon foot. When I showed him, I said, "Luke, do you want to be a real hybrid?" His eyes LIT up. (We tease, but not really, that the kids are hybrids because they are half Mexican and half American. They think it's cool that they have the best of both worlds. Man, how the world has changed...) So back to Walmart - I let him walk through the isles and show me what toys he liked. Indoraptor (aka Utahraptor). LEGO Pachycephalosaur set (the one that looks like it has a skullet and rams into things). Anything from Jurassic World. Which is ok since he would actually play with it. Luke and Mila have been building a Jurassic Park out of LEGO men, plastic dinosaurs, stuffed animals and babies, and just about anything else they can get their hands on. Their summer project. Daddy said he couldn't get anything that night, but maybe he would get something on Friday (hinting at a zoo-type something from our day trip).

The zoo was so much fun! The car ride was long, and a little uncomfortable. Luke didn't try to guess where we were going or question much at all - even when he saw the sign for Omaha! It wasn't until he saw the desert dome that he put two and two together. And we chose the perfect company to come with us. The kids were all excitement. So much so that we had to continually tell Luke to take it easy. Although the weather seemed like it might get unbearably hot, we chose to see everything outside early in the day. A good choice. And everything inside during the afternoon. Mila wasn't scared of the skylift at all. She said, "We're flying!" and pointed out the rhinos, the big birds (ostriches), and the lions. We did get Luke a wheelchair, but for that first part he had to walk. And he didn't care. Toward the end, he was offering ME the wheelchair. My favorite parts had to be the butterflies (that Natalie is scared of and Mila loved), the aquarium that you walk through (we saw divers go in with the sharks!), and the lied jungle (with free-flying bats that Natalie is also afraid of). We had it easssssy this year - only a single bat sleeping in the long tunnel! Luke told me today that all he can think about is the monkey that was picking his behind. I mean, he was digging! At several angles!! :P Yuck! Oh, and there was the "escape ape", the orangutan that started to unscrew his glass enclosure. While the husbands went to get the cars, the wives and the kids checked out the after-hours family festival. They had vendors everywhere. When we asked what was going on, all they said was that they come twice a year and everything is free, so go get something. We took the bubbles ("that help with asthma"), went to the photobooth, made some sensory bags, grabbed some cotton candy and free Dip N Dots too!! That's when we found out that it was for special needs kids. !!!! Good thing the husbands called for us to pack up because we would have done balloons and face painting too! Instead we went down the walk of shame. Haha! The misadventures of us!

Our Day Trip to the Omaha Zoo
(I didn't get many pictures because we were travelling with a professional photographer, who blocked all my shots... but that's alright... 
I expect to see some good ones posted.)

You would think after that, we'd go back to something "normal".

Well, it's not so much family-related, but this week has been crazy at work too. There's construction going on outside. The road in front of the library will have improvements later on, and to prepare for that they have to move the water line, which is right at the entrance of our parking lot. The first day coming in this week, no one was here to let me in. I had to chance my key code and hope that no cops showed up. The second day, there was a huge hole in the entrance and I wasn't expecting that until the following week, so I drove around thinking we might be closed if no one called me back. We had to park on the street. It was also the day of a bus trip. The hole got filled in right before that showed up. And then the guys cut into our phone and internet line. Nice. It's been a wild week at work.

So then, there's today. Today we went back to the pediatric orthopedic specialist to see how Luke's left foot is (the one in the boot). The Dr. still couldn't see any brakes or fractures on the x-rays, but was certain that something was broken because of the amount of swelling, discoloration and tenderness in certain areas. We go back in 3 weeks. For the time being, Luke has to wear his boot most of the time. The exceptions are at night he can take it off to sleep, when he takes a bath, and possibly the pool (but if he's at the pool, he's not really swimming... it will be hard for him to move around and he can't get hit either). Then, getting into the car to go home we hear a hiss coming from the vent. And then the cold air was gone. I'm hoping with all the hope that I have for my car, that it's just a valve come loose and let all the freon out. Because at this point... all we can do is laugh and keep going.

Camp is 9 days away. <sigh> And boy am I counting down...

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

Half Way There

Week 191/2


Well I feel horrible. I haven't written in months! I'm sorry, Child #3... I really wanted you to have your own book too. It seems like you're only going to have about five pages if I keep this up. :(

Our schedule seems to stay full - whether it's with being pastors of The Mix: Kids and forming the lessons/skits/games/etc., work-related things, birthdays and holidays, or taking care of the house. In almost 30 years of living, YESTERDAY I MOWED THE LAWN FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER. It took a phone call to the husband and the help of two of my neighbors to realize the gas was empty, but I did it! It's amazing what used to be on my "things I want to do" list vs. my list now. Mowing? Really?
And on that topic, Luke and I started our own garden at the beginning of May. We bought rosemary, cucumbers, sweet peppers, and watermelon. Mila played with the packets, so we ended up losing one and just bought a rosemary plant to get us started. And now we have cucumber sprouts too! I don't think our sweet peppers made it. I kept them inside by the patio door for the light to come in, but it was also next to the air vent. They probably froze (oops). I used to hate gardening with mom and getting my hands dirty... now I'm turning into a mowing, gardening enthusiast. Is this a mid-life thing?!

Aldo had his 30th birthday in April. Days before he asked me if I had planned anything - "A party? A hotel stay just for us?" - I felt so bad because I was just going to get him a drill and call it good. This was his 30th! A drill doesn't exactly scream I love you, does it? So last minute, I got the family on board for a surprise Escape Room. I used the phrasing "appointment" because I knew he would assume a baby doctor appointment. I planned on who would watch the kids and how to get them there. I planned on the timing and mapped out the drive. Why take Metcalf instead of I-35? - Because I'm having a craving and your sister told me about this bakery (who knew it was a lame "We don't have dairy", vegan cafe?). He loved it. The family loved it. So much that they requested it for the next birthday. Haha! We escaped with about 6 minutes left. We totally could have beat that time - Maecy and I had to keep rechecking the locks after a certain younger cousin tried the combinations, Granddad stared at an address book for quite a bit of time and when the information we needed came up he didn't realize it until Mom had searched and found the answer, and it took us forever to understand how to unlock the actual safe. The one thing I didn't like is that they gave us clues without us asking for them. I would recommend something and a second later, they would say the exact same thing. We didn't need the clue! Anyways, lots of fun. Highly recommend. Perfect for the guy who likes puzzles.
Team "Find Aldo" Got 2nd Place for the Day

Joshua Tarin, our newest nephew, was born on May 1, 2018 a little before 2pm. He weighed a whopping 8lb 6oz. You should see his cheeks! I was too sick with allergies and gunk to visit at the hospital, but I saw him at 5 days old and he's adorable - not as chunky as everyone said. Just his cheeks. And he seemed so laid back too. After Luke asked to hold him, Mila wanted to as well. She helped hold his feet and later I placed his bum in her lap. She "tickled" his feet a lot. Now whenever she gets on my phone and sees the pictures, she thinks it's funny that she tickled the baby's feet. Mateo loves having a baby brother, so I continue to hope that Mila will do well with having a new baby too.
 
Visiting Baby Joshua



So as far as baby news...
I've been feeling great. Some days I have energy, some days I need a 3 hour nap and crash at 10pm, leaving Aldo alone to finish whatever show we had been watching together. But the nausea is gone and that makes me so happy! I had to go to the maternity store the other day because my pants weren't fitting. Not even the maternity pants/skirts I had before. I found some cute stuff and just in time for camp mode. Honestly, I could walk around in a tank and my underwear all day long, but since we don't have curtains on the sliding glass door and our neighbor mows and waters the grass almost daily, I don't think he'd appreciate it.
This past week I've finally felt the kicks. Or I guess now I am certain they are kicks. Also note that this week my app says that baby's legs are growing... so it all makes sense.
Our next appointment is the big one. Where we find out gender. Or do we?
We haven't decided yet what we want to do. This entire pregnancy I've just told everyone that we're finding out. But then it hit me, this might be the best time for it to be a surprise. We have one boy and one girl. Baby, you're the tie breaker! And it would be fun to have a reveal party, not so much to get stuff, but just to celebrate. I thought maybe when we go in for our appointment, I ask for them to put the results in an envelope. And then we can decide what we want to do after. The library ladies have a joke that they'll do a pool to see how long I can go without looking in the envelope (Jenne has me at within the day). After talking with Aldo, he said he can't have it in the house because he'll look behind my back. Can't blame him - I planned on doing the same thing... I would attempt to wait 24 hours at least. It's just so hard because you want to start thinking of names and what colors to get, plan on where the baby is going to go and announce to your other kids that they're going to have a baby _________. 
I will say this - both Aldo and I think we are having a boy, but for different reasons. Aldo's mom told him that Mila would reveal what we're having by her behavior. Seems jealous and has an attitude? We're having a girl. Cuddly? We're having a boy. Mila has been full of cuddles, but that's not much different from her usual self. I am more convinced by the fact that my nausea resembled what I experienced with Luke and that my emotions aren't all over the place like with Mila. But it really is a toss up, because every pregnancy is different.

Mommy Daughter Selfie Session ;-D

Speaking of... I should get some pregnancy pictures while I still have "the glow" and not the "uncomfortable behemoth" look.

Tuesday, March 6, 2018

Two Months of Updates

Trimester 1 - Week 9

It's been busy.

Aldo
I didn't mention this in the last post, but it should be a continuation... he was pushed out of his job as manager. While it absolutely sucked that the company used him like they did, in a round-about way it was a good move for us because now he is selling bedroom sets and furniture like nobody's business and making that dough... for us to afford the house comfortably and get our emergency fund back in place.

Me
I took on some more hours at work as well, and with that more responsibility. (This was before I knew I was pregnant.) And so now, I spend a lot of my time researching and putting together displays. I thought I was just going to be a chump person - the one that pulls the books and makes a sign or something, but nope.... I pretty much do it all. And so now there is hardly any down time. Right now I should honestly be putting together some non-fiction end caps, but I decided to catch up on here today. I want to keep these memories, you know?
And I don't get much done around the house either because morning sickness (mostly nausea) has just been hitting me like crazy. It's all day too. Ugh. I hate it. I've tried Emetrol, sea bands, ginger ale, pregnancy pops, avoiding certain foods and snacking throughout the day. Nothing works completely. The feeling is always in the back of my throat or the back of my chest. So I'm really looking forward to our first doctor's appointment on Thursday.
The house is overwhelmingly big. I have the basics unpacked. I haven't cleaned the hardwood floor since we moved in, so there's boot prints still going throughout the house... and it's because I haven't unpacked the cleaning supplies to do it. Energy level = zero. BUT, I do have motivation to get things together and done, house decorated, etc. because I opened my mouth and offered to host a baby shower for Maecy. She's due in late April/early May (May 1st) with baby boy #2.

Luke
Luke is enjoying school. He's glad to be back with his friends. He also likes the house. Although Mila gets into his room all the time and messes it up. Eventually we'll have his room in place too. Poor kid has a tub in his closet full of toys. We just need a lot of shelving.
Lately he's been working on riding his new bike that he got for Christmas (without training wheels!). We had his first crash on pavement the other day. He cried and squinted his eyes in pain for a while, but wanted to get back on the bike the next day. Except it's been really windy lately. And he's not the best at balancing and turning at the same time (the longest pedal he had, I thought he was going to go straight into the woods), so adding wind isn't probably the greatest idea.

 Riding His Bike with Grammy's Coaching

Mila Trying to Impress Big Brother


Mila
She's learning that "Mommy's the boss. Daddy's the big boss. And Luke and Mila are monkeys." She challenges me every day. But at the same time she's so cuddly. While it was cold out, we've just been watching movies together and/or she's on my phone on Youtube watching these play-dough movies in Chinese. Where does she find this stuff? But since it's warmed up a bit, she likes going outside and looking for Max (dog from Secret Life of Pets). Luke's supposed to look for Chloe, the cat. I'm just glad they're getting some sunshine.

Yay! We have a slide!
 
Where's Max?
 

More to come as I take pictures I guess. I'll make a point to do that.

Wednesday, January 31, 2018

Welcome to the Neighborhood

Sorry I haven't written in a while. Nothing interesting has happened lately until everything happened. And all at once. (That's how it usually goes, isn't it?)

The biggest piece of news I can offer is that - we found a house we liked and bought it. Honestly it wasn't the dream home I pictured. On the day we looked at it for the first time, Aldo and I had seen four houses altogether. The first house we were really interested in. It was the three bedroom, ranch. Absolutely no storage and across the street from the high school. We thought it was something we could afford and a good starter home, so everything after that we weren't really paying attention to. The second house, I think, was the one with the pool and jacuzzi - and the mold. The third house was a really classy, split level. It had white carpet! It was too much. Not in price, but in looks. I told Aldo that I wouldn't be able to enjoy it because I'd want it clean all the time and with our kids I know that I'd probably have a few meltdowns living there. The last was our house. But at first sight, the outside was nice. It was dark. I didn't get a good look. When we first walked in, we came through the garage, so it didn't give me that welcoming feel that a guest would get. The floors were hardwood. And the living room was set up in a way that just felt cold. I HATED how they set up their living room. AND the dining room was a play area with things stuck to the walls. Nah. But good area nonetheless, and when I looked it up, the asking price was just too high. The neighborhood wasn't even plausible.

So skip forward to after we questioned why we didn't take a second look.
God's Plan #1 - They had taken it off the market.

Second look went better. It was during the day and we really slowed down. I saw past the set up of the house and past the hardwood, and thought - hmmm... it really is what we are looking for.

God's Plan #2 - Hardwood is a blessing. Do you know how much dirt and dust get in the carpet that doesn't get picked up? And, my kids are the ones that are dropping popcorn and sticky poptart on the carpet.

God's Plan #3 - It was the last house on the block and had the brand new privacy fence. (Catty corner to the very first house we were interested in. And guess what? That house was split level with the kitchen and everything on top, whereas our kitchen, dining, and living room are on the main floor and only bathroom and bedrooms are located on the top level.)

We put in a reasonable offer. On that same day, they had another couple look at it, who also put in an offer. Our offers were similar, so we got dibs because we were there first... and we had the realtor.

God's Plan #4 - For some reason, we felt we needed to stick with our realtor (after several people said we could go without, or put in their two cents about us using a family member who just got his real estate license), but this ended up working in our favor.

God's Plan #5 - I decided long ago that I would never make a big decision without sleeping on it. And so we asked to sleep on it, knowing that we might lose the deal to the other couple. The (previous) owners worked with us and let us have that time.

They came back with a number that was just too high for us. I was at work at the library and I was cracking numbers all morning. At that same moment in time, Aldo was at home thinking that we could do the deal. When I got back to the apartment, I told him we could do the monthly payments and it would be tight, but I was more worried about our emergency fund being depleted because of the closing costs. So we answered back with a simple, "No."

God's Plan #6 - I don't know what happened, but there was some miscommunication somewhere, and we didn't get their lowest offer, which was that they would pay half the closing costs. And I don't know how I missed it, but I completely forgot that escrow goes toward the closing costs. And somehow we were able to work it out with the mortgage company for them to pay $1000 of our closing costs because we went with a certain type of loan. And so with that final number, all of our closing costs would be paid for in full, arriving at the grand total that I wrote down while I was cracking numbers earlier that morning.

After arriving at the amount, everything else seemed like a whirlwind. Our closing date was stated. We were signing papers left and right. The inspection went quickly (and by the way, get a GOOD inspection if you're wondering what to spend your money on). There were three issues: the roof had some hail damage, the furnace had a crack, and there was evidence of what could be mold in the laundry room/basement.

God's Plan #7 - The (previous) owners' insurance bought us a new roof to replace the 15 year old roof, they had the air conditioner and furnace serviced so we would be covered in case it went out, and they replaced all four walls 2 feet up in the basement AND painted it with the color we picked out, including the pole. It looks awesome!

It was back to back to back, everything happening. The appraiser came. His amount matched what we agreed on exactly. And then it came down to the closing date. Toward the end the (previous) owners asked us for an extra day to move out. And being the understanding, empathetic people that we are, it took everything in us to agree with what our realtor recommended and not allow it due to liability issues.

God's Plan #8 - Interesting enough, the (previous) owners had an agreement early on for a home, which fell through. While we were under contract, they ended up finding another house, better than the last! And, after all their pleading for extra time, they ended up texting us in the middle of our closing to say they were all moved out. (We thought we wouldn't be able to move in until 5 o'clock! This was at probably 9:30 in the morning.)

That afternoon we were able to pray over and anoint the house. This was home!

We had so much help the following days moving in. It didn't take much at all. We have really great family and friends.

God's Plan #9 - I know this was part of God's plan... I just can't remember why/how... and you'll find out as you read further. I think it had something to do with relying on God and money (because that's usually what he uses to show me He's in control). But, within the week, one night I was driving down a road and pointing out to Aldo that the police really patrol in the area. They are stickler about speed zones! I showed him EXACTLY where they park, and it's in dark areas so you can never tell that they're there. Or the speed changes quickly in this spot. The next day, guess what happened?! Aldo got a speeding ticket. Right where I pointed it out! The cop was surprised at his clean record at his age, and found out we were "new" residents, and told him she would have let him off the hook, but at the speed he was going she was required to give him a ticket. "Welcome to the neighborhood." We decided to pay double so it wouldn't affect our car insurance.


The next week, the furnace stopped working. We were without heat for two days because of a control box and panel (a bill over $1500 for parts and labor). Thank goodness for our HWA (home warranty)! It cost us $100 flat.

And then, God's Plan #10 - We found out we were pregnant.

 Welcome Home!
(January 19, 2018)

Friday, October 6, 2017

Buying a Home for Newbies

I just wanted to make a quick post here to pass on my expertise to the next first-time homebuyer...

1. Be prepared for a range of emotions. The first house you come across probably isn't "The One". Even the first one you think you're going to put an offer on probably isn't "The One" (unless it's a brand spankin' new house). As hard as you try not to get you're hopes up, the experience is so exciting and scary at the same time that if you're a breathing human you're bound to be disappointed when something doesn't work out. That's okay. You're going to have some connection with the properties. But don't be devastated, because there are more houses to come. You will find "The One" and it will be perfect. Take your time.

In our story, I've already shared the first day of major house visiting. The second round was even more exciting because we were THAT much closer. The original plan was to view the house with Aldo's dad and if it passed with him, then we were to make an offer. Well, our visit went from seeing the one to seeing two, then seeing four! Alright, we have "backups", we thought. It's a good thing we planned it this way because as we went through the house for the second time, we started finding smaller things we ignored the first time around - like the bite marks on the stairs from the family dog, the dips in the deck surrounding the pool, evidence of age of the pool, the entire layout of the basement (which I couldn't even remember! You think the house you're planning on moving into, you'd remember...), and the mold growing in it. Yep, that's right. Abuelito found live mold in one of the storage rooms downstairs. So with that, we had to walk away. Who knows how much the mold had spread and the cost to fix the problem? On top of that, mold is not something I want to mess with health-wise. Living in my mom's basement led to worries of mold and it's effects on my kids' asthma. Walking away is a hard, but a wise thing to do.

We went on to the second house. Going in I was bummed and kind of done with the day. This was the second time we found a great place and it fell through. First, foundation issues. Now, mold. What's next? The second house was a ranch house, super plain. No basement. Only 3 bedrooms. Not old at all. A decent size to take care of. An open backyard, and only one neighbor because it sits at the end of the road next to a field. Aldo and his dad were in love. For the right price, this could be it. To me, it felt industrial, almost like a larger apartment.

The third and fourth were in HOA territory, which early on we wanted to avoid. We agreed to look at them because the dues were low and had heard that the restrictions weren't all that bad (ask permission before erecting a shed, two animals per property, etc.). I knew immediately walking into the first HOA that it wasn't the one. You had to go up stairs to get to the kitchen and main floor, the downstairs room was ugly from imitation wood flooring and a country (mom-type) sink. Ugh. AND, the carpets were so spotless and off-white in their color that the owners requested we wear booties for our look through. It felt like the house was too high class for us. I knew that if we moved in, I would be anal about keeping it in the same condition. I want freedom in our house. Freedom to enjoy it and live in it. Here I couldn't do that. The second wasn't too bad, but I just didn't care for the layout. It was also the highest priced. I agree with what my dad said to me later that night, "If you have to pick up extra hours to buy the house, you want to love it so much that you can't stand being away from it." Okay, so that may be a little dramatic, but the thought holds value.

2. Give yourself wiggle room. Ask the what-ifs. What if I lose my job and it's just Aldo paying for it? What if we get pregnant again? What if we decide to get Luke a dog? What if we can't afford to maintain a pool? So with all of those questions, we cracked numbers for worst-case scenario and knew what our "sweet spot" was and what we were watching for. With Aldo's logic, I realized more and more that house #2 from our second visit, was more of a possibility. Probably a good business deal. And that's what home-buying is. It's a business deal. You buy a house to make money, not because you dream of being a home owner. At the right price and when looking at a 5 year plan (Fact: on average people only live in their homes for 5 years), house #2 was looking like a sweeter deal.

3. Understand the process. And understand what you're signing. I took a free class online a while back that ends in a certificate (which some lenders require you to take). It's through United Guaranty and you can find it at - https://www.ugcorp.com/homebuyers/homebuyers-educational-certification-program.html. We also got pre-approved and had a financial advisor break down what our upfront costs would be and what our expected costs would be later. With all that info, plus asking for utility bills from the homes we were looking at, etc. we were able to budget like homeowners. And prepare for the "earnest money" (good faith money that is put toward the payment later = $1000), the inspection and appraisal, down to the loan application fee.

So yesterday, we put an offer on house #2. We have a really good "broker" aka our real estate agent who has explained everything as well. She has worked non-stop at getting comparable home prices, talking with the buyers' agents, and adding in her own advice. She went over the contract that you sign when you are making the first offer. Did you know there's a timeline on when you can have an inspector look at the house, otherwise you waive your rights? Did you know if she is someone else's agent and they are also interested in the same property, she can show them? Did you know that if the seller fails to pay the commission of the agents, it falls on you? Do you know when the contract is void? From what I can tell, since the seller appears to be a "trustee" for someone and knowing that the property has been vacant for a year, something happened with the homeowner (death or moved into a home) and someone else took it over. Now they're selling it. I'm hoping that the person wants nothing to do with it and they're just ready to get rid of it, and give it to us at this initial offer. That would be awesome and a miracle!

Our contract ends today. If it is agreed on then our closing date is set for 11/30/2017. Here's some more things to blow your mind... we have to give 60 days notice to our apartment complex before moving out (that would be Oct. 21) and our lease is up Dec. 31. If all works out, we'd be able to move into the house Dec. 1 and take a month doing so. !!! Now I'm eager! But the key is to remain calm and think clearly. Make smart decisions no matter how eager you are to get into the house.

Sorry, my short post turned into a long one. Thankful for favor! <3
(Oh, and praying for peaceful sleep! I've found myself waking up at 3 o'clock in the morning cracking numbers. #lifeofabudgeter)

Thursday, September 28, 2017

Unless the Lord

Psalm 127

Unless the Lord builds a house,
the work of the builders is wasted.
Unless the Lord protects a city,
guarding it with sentries will do no good.
It is useless for you to work so hard
from early morning until late at night,
anxiously working for food to eat;
for God gives rest to his loved ones.

Children are a gift from the Lord;
they are a reward from him.
Children born to a young man
are like arrows in a warrior's hands.
How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them!
He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the city gates.


I haven't been able to sleep lately. I have a lot of things going through my head... mostly cracking numbers and saying "what if -this-" and "what if -that-". We're looking for a home. Like an actual downpayment, homeowner's insurance, pay taxes, maintenance-upkeeping, equity-type home. We thought about it before when Mom put her house up for sale and made those wild plans to move to Tennessee, but since we didn't have the lines of credit at the time we chose to rent until the possibility presented itself. Now, having rented for a year, the time has come. I'm filled with excitement and overwhelming alarm. Haha! But mostly excitement.

The home search has been fun. Our financial advisor came highly recommended from a trusted source, and he recommended our real estate agent who is seriously top dog in her field. And then we're surrounded by people that know what they're talking about in certain areas. 

Well, you know me... conservative with a capital C and Aldo is "cheap" according to his BFF. lo So the first house we looked at was well below our price range. (We got approved for a $280K loan! Isn't that ridiculous?! I'll give you some comparison... we rent right now for $685/mo + storage and utilities. A $280,000 home has a payment of over $1800/mo. That's more than double what we're paying now! That's more than one of Aldo's paychecks! One and one don't equal two in their world of math I guess.) The first house we looked at was listed at $146K. It looked like a small box and I didn't like it from the pictures. Lack of garage and lack of yard were a turn-off, but I thought you know what, maybe we should check it out. Maybe it just looks small. Maybe small is what we can take care of to start. My first impression was right in this case... it is a box that needs to be torn down. It's not worth fifty bucks. I think it's been abandoned (should be condemned) for years and just recently the seller painted some walls and put it on the market. Yikes! When we first walked in the floors were on a slant, the upstairs rooms Aldo could barely fit in because the ceilings were low, and we couldn't tell which room was the "master bedroom" because we wouldn't be able to fit our bedroom furniture altogether in any of the rooms. 
We looked at a range of houses in one day. So our next house was off of main street in a quiet little neighborhood. The owners had lived there 40 years. When we walked in it immediately reminded me of my Grandma because of the taste and narrowness of the hall. It was listed at $199K, but it was probably more in the $170's. There were so many rooms in the house, I felt like we don't have enough furniture to fit in it all. And the backyard was HUGE with a gated, above ground pool. The problems I had with it were the age of HVAC system and other things like that which would definitely need replaced in the near future, as well as the small bathrooms for oompa-loompas (we'd have to knock out a wall to fit comfortably in the bathroom), and the care for the HUGE backyard and maintenance of the pool. Also, I would just feel bad asking a sweet grandma for a lower price. I know... I know... it's business.
The final house of the day was off of my old street "Hickory" in what was the newer, rich part of town when I was growing up. The home was a 3 bedroom with a 4th non-conforming (without windows) bedroom and they were asking $209K. A bit high for us, but we wanted range. The house was alright, nothing red flagged. Mila liked the open kitchen. And plenty of parking. My issue was the backyard. It was another house with an above ground pool AND jacuzzi, but because of the extravagance of those the yard had been taken up. I want our kids to have space to run and play catch, play tag, practice soccer, whatever! We made the choice to keep looking.

From the beginning, my desire (and Aldo's too) has been to follow God's will. If it's His will for us to move, we'll move. If it's His will for us to stay, we'll stay. I know that God opens doors and He closes them. I know that the right time will come for a house. I just want it to be the right house. I put my needs and requests before Him (kind of like the red, 10-speed bike story)... a 4 bedroom or 3 bedroom with room to expand, an ample yard, in the school district we chose, at a price we could afford, and if at all possible before December so we didn't have to sign on for another 6 months or go month-to-month.

I thought we may have found that home THE NEXT DAY. The next morning after praying I woke up to find a home that had gone back on the market at $198K after a sell had fallen through. It was next door to the older home in that charming little neighborhood on the corner lot. IT WAS PERFECT! The layout made sense. The covered deck to uncovered deck was beautiful. The yard space was -no words-. And the storage space was ridiculous. It even had a tree fort with a homemade zip line in the backyard. When we looked at it, Luke's cousins were with us and you could just feel that it was a perfect family hangout. Yes, there were some small projects here and there like the main shower needed more tile, doors replaced, rooms repainted and more caulking in areas... and some larger things that weren't immediate like the driveway completely redone and a large tree removed from the backyard. But nothing seemed too big. Until the basement. There were cracks in the basement. I've researched this and not all cracks are bad; cracks can be a sign of settling which houses do that. Vertical cracks are common and can be solved with epoxy and are fine for another 50 years. The most serious cracks are horizontal. You're looking at building an entirely new foundation for between $30,000-40,000. These cracks, were unfortunately, bad. And I don't think they would go down thirty grand from what our initial offer would be (looking in the $130-lower $140's).

I wasn't devastated, but I was bummed. Houses in the area aren't really coming up on the market, and when they do, they aren't up for long. I cracked numbers again and again and again. Our "sweet spot" is the $180's. We can afford the insurance, the lawn mower, the internet, even put Luke in sports and save money in the $180's. I could choose to go back to work another day or stay home still. We could pay off the car or not pay off the car. There's wiggle room. There are choices. If we want to get a house this year, our final option was one up-and-coming home in a new neighborhood that we'd be able to actually design a little bit for $235K. With that we'd have to pay off the car, Aldo get a raise, and me pick up more hours (and not eat... j/k) to get by. I was actually pumping myself up... you know we could do it. We could get a new house. But then, I thought "what if". What if something happened? What if Aldo wanted to go back to school? What if he lost his job? What if he had to take a pay cut? What if his hours changed... could I change my hours so easily? I didn't like the feeling of "STUCK". We would be stuck in whatever situation to barely make it. I want to enjoy my home. Not despise it. So new home was a no.

I don't know what made us look back at it, but I'm glad we didn't cross it off of our radar completely. 

Before I go into further detail, I want to say this: There's pros and cons to a pool. 
PRO #1 - Easy family time and entertaining. Welcoming friends and yahoos from all around. Bonus: jacuzzi would surely entice our friends to come visit and stay a while.
PRO #2 - They don't affect the value of the home (if above ground) either way, good or bad. 
PRO #3 - You can disassemble. You can resell (and get a good amount depending on age and care).
CON #1 - Lack of yard.
CON #2 - Another thing to maintain. And cost comes with that also.
CON #3 - Liability. It will increase insurance by about $50 because it is a safety issue.

We looked back again at the one with the pool and jacuzzi and small yard... the one where Mila felt comfortable in the kitchen... the one that had a recently updated HVAC and water heater... the one that seemed out of our "sweet spot". We looked again at the comps; they were in the $180's. Is the only thing keeping us from reconsidering this house the pool and lack of yard? Earlier, when I was researching pools and maintenance of them I found that it only costs about $200-250 a year per the national average. And since water bills should be that high anyway, a double in water bill still wouldn't be high. Since this house is in our "sweet spot", we could afford it with the pool and live comfortably. Luke could still do sports. There is still wiggle room and space to get out. If we had to, we could sell the pool! I thought about it and I'm thinking logically (I think) -
We could buy the house. For the first year, keep the pool and jacuzzi and get experience and enjoy it. We could have pool parties for birthdays. We could still get a small dog if we want (a $50/mo expenditure) and even it would have ample space to run in the backyard. We could get a handle on mowing that amount of space. The kids could use the front yard if necessary. And, if after playing with it a little we decided to sell the pool and jacuzzi; we could do it. And build a better deck. And have a larger yard. There is still movement. There are still possibilities. We can do it! So, next week we are going to look at it with Aldo's dad and possibly put in an offer. That is the plan.

Here is the final point I want to make and it goes back to the beginning (HAHA, that's ironic. "Alpha and Omega... Beginning and End... #pastorpuns) 
Unless the Lord. 

Unless the Lord makes it happen, we're not moving into that house. Unless the Lord sends peace of mind by His Holy Spirit, we're not buying. We won't budge. The Lord has surrounded us with multiple advisors and examples; we're going to listen to that sound counsel. We're going to succeed in our home search but it's only with the Lord's direction. And I know, without a doubt, He loves me. So what if he threw in a pool and jacuzzi because he knew that the first year or so we wouldn't need the yard? What if he threw in a bonus (a well, taken care of bonus that would give us money back in the future)? I don't know. The future is full of possibilities, isn't it?

P.S.
I had a dream with House #4 (bad foundation house). God asked me if I was ready for the responsibility of owning a home. I weakly said "Yes, I think so." And He smiled and showed me a vision of a father asking their child if he or she was ready for the responsibility of taking care of a dog. And of course, the kid would say yes. And then after a week of taking care of the dog, they'd slowly get away from it. But mom and dad would make sure the dog got taken out for walks or to go to the restroom, went to the vet, and made sure it had plenty of food. The dog was taken care of. In that, God was showing me that He's my Father. Yes, he'd give me the responsibility of homeownership, but He'd still be there to provide like a parent. He's the BEST.

Friday, September 1, 2017

hCG

I guess this post will just be fact-driven. I'm still a little unsure about it and how much to disclose and to who. You know when something bad happens and you're thrust into a sort of twilight zone, and everything around you is moving but you are there  stuck in time thinking this isn't really happening...? It's been like that.
So Sunday, August 27th started off like any other day. The boys spent the night with us to hang out with Luke, so they came to church with us in the morning. After church we went to pick up some birthday presents for Mila from Aunt Dolores'. Then I was headed home, but Noah said his stomach didn't feel well. I changed my plans to get the kids some food, then go to the apartment, and then drop them off. But then Vero started texting me about a Big Brother program and was worried I was going to be late bringing the boys back, so I changed my plan again. After picking up the food, which took forever... Noah was really complaining about his stomach. I was concerned so I rushed him home. When we got there he was really ... milking it??... So much so that his mom and Aldo's mom thought he might have gave himself a hernia and/or ripped something while swinging at church. (Side note: the last time they came to our church we had the inflatable slide incident and Noah got hurt. Why do this kids always get hurt? And why does it have to be at church?!) I felt miserable. They talked about taking him to the emergency room. So I called Aldo as I was headed back to the apartment to get their stuff and return it. When I got back, everything was fine like nothing happened. It was weird. But in the end, I had less to worry about, right...

When I finally got home, I was exhausted. I just sat on the gray chair and looked at my phone.
I had been texting a friend about breastfeeding when I had the urge to use the restroom. That's when everything started. Ask-a-Nurse told me to go to the emergency room immediately, but not to drive (even though I'm 5 minutes away... and the only thing that kept me from going on my own was that I'd have two kids in the car with me.) The nurses were afraid I would pass out. Thirty minutes later Aldo was taking me to the hospital and the kids were with the Gutz.

Hospital Worsts:
- The wait. Not the wait to get a room. The wait for the results. First there was a pee test to see if I really was pregnant. Then a blood test for hCG levels. Then a sonogram, which was too early to tell anything but we still waited for it. The pee test was positive. The blood test wouldn't give us results for a day so we were told to go home. Final release statement: see your OB within 2 days.
- The silence. The entire time Aldo didn't talk to me. He kept busy by being on his phone. I know he was worried and I was too and trying to understand what factors there were, etc. but the silence sucked.
- The suddenness. It's so sudden that you don't think about how you didn't shave your legs that day. Or shower. Gross. And of course, they have to look in those personal places... it was horrible! It was worse than the scene from that JLo movie where she's getting inseminated and all she can think of is her unpainted toenails. I guarantee my toenails were worse.

I didn't think of it until I had to in hindsight, that the previous night I was having increasingly painful cramps. The kind that made me rock back and forth to feel better. I had been having cramps here and there. I thought it was my uterus changing and sac forming and hips spreading. It also occurred to me that I had stronger morning sickness before, but the days leading up to this point, it was getting less frequent, less intense.

Tuesday we saw my OB. She reassured us that it could be anything. A bleeding problem can be taken care of by taking a pill. So the days leading up to this were tiring and anxious and sad. This visit was hopeful and restorative.

The next day I got my results at work. Aside from the rudeness of whoever called me, my hCG levels had dropped from a 140-something to 78.

I had a miscarriage.

The scientific, technical term for it is "chemical pregnancy", but I was told not to use that term by my dad. Do I feel like I lost something/someone? To me, it felt like I lost the hope of someone and hope of a surprising, yet happy change. To me, it felt like others were trying to downplay it because "nothing formed" and to make me feel better about losing "nothing". Something formed. I felt it exit my body. It might have been the start of a sac or whatever, but my body said it was pregnant. It began the work. And shortly after, it stopped. That's the facts. Anything above a 25 on an hCG test means you're pregnant. And that hCG level doubles at least ever two days.

It all came down to that hCG level.

I had a dream that week and it's really the only thing that made me feel better in those first couple of days when we were still unsure about things. I had a dream that a voice told me it was a girl. And what brought me comfort was knowing that one way or another I would see my girl. Maybe it's just a nice thought or maybe it's absolutely true. Now that it's been weeks I go back and it's like the entire time didn't happen. Miscarriages aren't that frequent. I don't have one. I was never pregnant. I won't have a "rainbow baby".  

STAT  - There is only a 30% chance of you getting pregnant each menstrual cycle.
STAT - Most doctors consider pregnancy to start at "implantation" rather than "fertilization".
STAT - 31% of pregnancies end in miscarriage after implantation. (That's one in three if you can do simple math.) But a lot of these ladies don't even know it because they didn't know they missed a period. With that said, about 15-20% of women with a confirmed pregnancy will have a miscarriage.
STAT - By the time you have passed the day you were supposed to start your period, implantation has already occurred.
STAT - 80% of miscarriages occur before 12 weeks (the first trimester). After 20 weeks a loss is termed a "stillbirth".
STAT - Half of all miscarriages are due to chromosomal abnormalities. The earlier the miscarriage, the more likely this is the cause.
(All of these stats were taken from https://www.verywell.com and http://www.pregnancyloss.info/. Of course these don't take into consideration age and previous miscarriages, etc.)

FACT - I can guarantee the first day of my last period. It was July 10th. I was supposed to start my period while we were on our California trip. That means implantation had occurred. (Shoot. Now I wish I didn't look up those bummer stats.)
FACT - Implantation occurs about 9 days after ovulation. I kept record of everything. My cycle is about 35 days long, so ovulation is between Day 19 and Day 21. *wink wink* Our anniversary happened in that ovulation window. Implantation probably occurred on August 7th. I'm actually fairly certain...
FACT - Going by the first day of my last period (which you can't argue), I would have been 5 weeks and 6 days along on August 27th. I miscarried just before 6 weeks.