What's The Matter With Boys

Lately I've been thinking about the day I found out I was having a boy. Just before, my mom told the nurse, "We don't WANT boys. We don't LIKE boys." I don't know what she was thinking... I only wanted a girl because I had more experience with girls, I had a name picked out, and she would have been the first (new clothes and lots of attention). But by no means did I have anything against boys.
I think about that day when I see Luke's eyes light up when he sees his Grammy and reaches out for her. When they're playing on the living room floor. When she's taking pictures and showing him off. When she volunteers to babysit for the night. He's certainly changed her mind.

When Luke was little, Aldo brought to my attention that boys are rough. That Luke's going to be coming home with scrapes and bruises. As a mother, I feel protective and always worrisome. I don't want to see that little guy hurt. The other day he was helping in the chicken coop and the space heater fell on his head. Thankfully I wasn't there to freak out. And also thankfully, he didn't have a bump or sign of it anywhere. Lucky. He also had his first temperature this weekend. It got all the way up to 101.2 in his armpit. I, of course, took it to the extreme and had Aldo call the nurse hotline, thinking Luke was going to be in ICU or something. Turns out babies can spike a temperature from about anything.
All in all, I don't think I'm ready for the roughness. I'm not ready for scrapes and bruises. I don't think I would mind to have wimpy kid. It hurts me to the core when I have to let him sit there and cry on the floor, instead of running to his side for help.

This feeling has probably come around more and more with Luke exploring and testing out new things. The other night I was relaxing on the couch while he was playing on the floor with his toys. Usually when he's tired of them and wants me to pick him up, he'll crawl over to me and just look up. This time he came over, lifted his hands to my pant legs, and pulled himself up to his knees, almost his feet. When they stand, they fall. I hope I can just get through this.